GCC Ultras to “Retire” the #1 Shirt



Pretty In Pink

Despite having never played a game as The Ultra’s, GCC Ultra’s T20 Squad Captain, Jonny Russell, announces today that the shirt numbered “1”, currently assigned to Stephen Wincott, will be “retired” after Steve’s Ultra’s career ends, expected to be after the 2097 season. Effectively, this means that, quite rightly, no other player will be able to wear the hallowed #1 shirt in Goring again.

Other famously retired sporting shirts include #99 for Wayne Gretsky in the NHL, #42 for Jackie Robinson in Major League Baseball and the number 13 subs shirt in Goring United’s Second XI for GCC scorer and umpire-in-waiting Cheesy “Cheesy P” P.


Masoom’s have put in an impressive bid for Wincott’s pink cricket shirt in order that it may be displayed proudly in their restaurant as belonging to one of their highly-valued customers – alongside Toby’s goatee when that goes this year, George Michaels’s Yank’ees cap and Lord (in waiting) Madjeski’s signed 10,000 issue of Autotrader (Central/South East edition).

However, other bidders have recently emerged in order to recognise the positive impact that Stephen has had on their businesses. Additional bidders include Amstel Light, Goring Social Club, Ralph Lauren Bicester Village Outlet Store and “Bell Fruit” Fruit Machines. Even internet-giant www.upswinger.com has put in an offer of 21p (2011 proceeds from club shop) to secure the shirt of its most frequent visitor – and as such, greatest contributor to ensuring that 20,000 visits were achieved within its first 12 months live. (so close now….but who will be the 20,000th visitor? I wonder…)

Stephen has been instrumental in the development of the Twenty20 “format” in Goring, and hence the development of the Ultras franchise; proving that high scores can still be made in the shorter game by simply bringing in the virtual boundary rope. Furthermore, and due to this innovation, Stephen is credited as the first ever GCC player to hit an 8 at the GCG – the first ball to land actually IN the “dog egg/waste repository/bin” at the corner of the recreation ground. The shot narrowly missed a much annoyed GCC Academy player and his girlfriend, who was, and I quote “almost hit by a flipping cricket ball off of that Winkers when I was giving my missus a hickey by the dirt box”. Quite.



One response to this post.

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Ben Fuggles, Upswinger. Upswinger said: GCC Ultras to “Retire” the #1 Shirt: http://t.co/Q0ETrc7 […]


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